You know the one:

"So… what do you do?"

It's predictable. It puts people in "pitch mode." And it kills any chance of a real conversation.

The Problem

So I'm trying something different at 3rd Space Bucharest events.

Instead of worrying about the venue or drink menu, I focus on implementing better questions people can answer.

We start simple with something like: "What's your favorite breakfast?" or "What was your first car?"

Sounds trivial. It's not.

The Shift

It does three things instantly:

• Removes pressure
• Creates shared laughter
• Gets people talking like humans, not job titles

From there, the tone shifts. People stop performing. They start engaging. Then we layer in short, unpolished stories from guests. Real experiences. No slides. No scripts.

Real Connection

And here's where it gets interesting: People don't just listen. They ask better follow-up questions. Curious questions. Personal questions. Questions that actually open people up.

That's when connection happens.

We then move into small, structured groups so conversations go deeper, not wider.

The Difference

Because here's the truth: Most events optimize for how many people you meet. I optimize for how well you meet them.

25 people. One room. Thoughtfully designed interactions.

The result? People stay longer. Conversations feel natural. No one is trying to "get something."

Just better questions leading to better conversations leading to real connection. That's the difference.

Final Thoughts

The secret to great networking isn't working the room or perfecting your elevator pitch. It's asking questions that make people feel like humans instead of job titles. Start simple, create space for real stories, and watch the connections happen naturally.

When you design events around quality over quantity, something shifts. People stop performing and start engaging. And that's when the magic happens.

Let's be honest. Most networking events feel like work. You walk in thinking: "Who do I talk to?" "What do I say?" "Am I interrupting?" That mental load? It kills the room before it even gets started.

Design Around It

So I design around it. Before the event even begins.

A week ahead, I send something simple: a preview of the room. Not just names, but who might click with who.

• Into AI? Meet this person.
• Into sports? Talk to these two.
• Into art, culture, travel? Here are your people.

Now when someone walks in, they're not guessing. They already have a direction. A reason to start a conversation. A little bit of confidence. I talk more about how I get people excited about a party before they walk in on my podcast.

Everything Changes

And that changes everything.

Because when you remove the pressure, people don't network. They connect.

And that's the difference between a typical event and a room people actually remember.

Final Thoughts

The secret isn't fancy drinks or the perfect venue. It's giving people a reason to connect before they even walk through the door. When you remove the guesswork, you remove the anxiety. And when you remove the anxiety, real conversations happen.

This approach has transformed how I host cocktail parties in Bucharest. People leave feeling like they made genuine connections, not like they survived another networking event.

Try it at your next gathering and watch the difference.

Last week I hosted a 3rd Space Bucharest cocktail party. Unlike traditional networking events where the hosts care more about the venue and drink menu, I introduced a question that turned a room full of strangers into real conversations.

The Icebreaker

After everyone arrived, I introduced an icebreaker for the entire group. In 30 seconds, people shared their name, what they were working on, and a fun fact about themselves.

The fun fact, aka opening icebreaker, was:

If you went to the Olympics, what sport would you play?

And within minutes... the room changed.

People laughed. Stories came out. Strangers started talking like they'd met before.

The Difference

That's what makes my social events different from all other meetups. Whereas other events lead to mostly surface-level conversations, 3rd Space Bucharest events are engineered to introduce better questions that create connection.

When you design the questions, you design the energy in the room. And once the energy shifts, better interactions follow.

Here is me with Valentin Radu who gave a lightning talk about why sometimes being wrong is a blessing.

Final Thoughts

The secret to great networking events isn't the venue or the drinks. It's the questions you ask. Design better questions, and you'll create real connections instead of awkward small talk.

When the energy in a room shifts, better interactions naturally follow. That's the power of intentional icebreakers.

Try this Olympic question at your next gathering and watch what happens.

Some answers last night:

• Arguing with 5-year-olds." 😂

• "Running… but only after a glass of wine."
• "Sleeping."

And yes, a few respectable answers like tennis, futbol, and figure skating.

But the real fun started after that.

The People

I met:

• Elena Enache, who survived a deep-diving accident last year
• Carmen Cristea-Barta, who works with NGOs helping kids in need
• Mihai Zăinescu, who said his dream superpower is time travel
• Rareș, who works in cybersecurity but secretly loves playing cards

Strangers Connecting

25 people.

A room full of strangers.

By the end of the night, some people were already making plans to meet again next week.

A couple of people even asked when I'm hosting a singles night. 😄

What's Next

If you're tired of traditional boring networking events, these gatherings offer something different. A relaxed space where strangers become friends and real connections happen.

That's why most parties suck and why we do things differently.

Learn more on the 3rd Space Bucharest website.

Why Remove Chairs?

Because they are detrimental. They encourage sedentary behavior which kills energy, restricts movement, and creates physical barriers to mingling. When a person sits down, they become stationary and less likely to meet new people. Standing on the other hand, creates easier interaction and more engagement.

Standing Creates Energy

So, while a comfortable chair is great for dinner, it drains energy for a networking event. Next time you walk into a networking event, notice the room. If many people are sitting... don't expect to see many conversations happening.

The Takeaway

Small details like removing chairs can make a big difference in how people interact at your party. Standing guests are more likely to mingle, move around, and engage with new people. It's one of the simplest ways to boost energy at any

• 

  Bucharest Cocktail Parties

  Jun 20, 2025

  I got tired of going to the same old events and having the same superficial…

. The environment you create shapes the experience your guests will have. Sometimes the best party hack isn't about what you add, but what you take away. If you're in Bucharest and want to meet 25 interesting people in a relaxed environment, check out

• 

  Connections with Eric EP 5: Tiny Apartment, Huge Vibes: What Actually Matters at a Party

  Oct 8, 2025

  Welcome back to Connections with Eric! In this fifth episode, I reveal the one thing…

and pick the room you want to walk into at 3rdspacebucharest.com.

Next Tuesday I'm hosting another 3rd Space Bucharest cocktail party where 25 entrepreneurs, creators, and expats come together for a few hours of real conversation. No pitches. No awkward networking circles. Just interesting people meeting other interesting people.

And the room is already shaping up to be a fascinating mix.

The Guests

Adriana Spataru-Florea will be there. She's a lawyer, but also the owner of Camera Lirica, a new bar in Bucharest that makes the best vermouth cocktails in town.

Then there's Virdea Marcel Andrei. By day he works in mortgage lending as a Key Account Manager at Alliance Finance Broker. But if you ask him what he actually enjoys most? Playing Padel. 🏓

Elena Enache will also be joining. She's the founder of Elevate Global and loves discussing futurism, innovation, and how humans stay relevant in a rapidly evolving digital world. Last I checked she was living in Dubai, though Bucharest seems to keep pulling her back.

We'll also have Mihai Zăinescu Zainescu, Managing Partner at Aptendo. He spends his time building AI-driven digital organizations and scaling engineering teams. If you're curious about what's actually happening in the AI world right now beyond the headlines, he's someone worth talking to.

And Miruna Dragomir, CMO at Planable, will be there too. She's deep in the world of SaaS marketing, attribution, AI, scaling teams. She's also a tennis fan. The real question is: Alcaraz or Sinner?

The Magic

The interesting thing about these cocktail parties is that none of these people know each other yet.

But give it two hours and suddenly the lawyer is talking to the AI founder, the SaaS CMO is swapping stories with the padel fanatic, and someone is planning a trip to Mexico with someone they just met.

Join Us

These gatherings bring together people with fascinating stories, not just impressive titles. It's where real conversations happen and unexpected connections form.

If you want to learn why throwing a party can change everything, this is the place to start.

If you'd like to experience one of these parties yourself, you can learn more and RSVP at 3rdspacebucharest.com.

Which means if you want to develop in real life connections, you have to intentionally find them or create the space for them.

The Idea

That's the idea behind my new project: 3rd Space Bucharest.

They are monthly small curated cocktail parties where:

• 25 interesting creatives, founders, expats gather
• Icebreakers make conversations easy
• Guests share short "mini-TED talks"
• People mingle without pressure
  

What It's Not

Not boring networking. Not dating.

Just a relaxed atmosphere designed for real conversation.

Because in person events are better than time spent scrolling.

Gallery

Here are a few pictures from this night.

Join Us

If you're looking to build real connections, 3rd Space Bucharest offers monthly curated gatherings with interesting people, easy icebreakers, and mini-TED talks. It's not about networking or dating. It's about creating space for genuine conversation.

You can also hear more about making friends in a foreign city on my podcast.

Interested in finding out about these cocktail parties? Click here for more.

That was one of the icebreakers at our 3rd Space Bucharest cocktail party last night. And the answers were incredible.

One person wrecked their car three times in one hour. Another admitted they crashed their first car while playing Pokémon Go. Someone else drove their first car into a lake… with themselves still inside.

The Cars

There was a Dacia 1301. An old Mercedes. A company car Škoda Kodiaq. A beat-up Volkswagen Golf.

And one person who said they saved a long time to buy their first car and when it got its first scratch… they cried.

No Pressure

This is what happened when 25 people got in a room with no pressure to perform.

No pitches. No awkward networking. No "So what do you do?" interrogation loops.

Just curiosity. Stories. And people actually listening to each other.

Real Connection

Huge thanks to wonderful people like Andra Ghibuțiu, Carmen Dima, Anca Constantin, Richard P. and many others who made the night special.

This is why I host 3rd Space Bucharest parties every month for creatives, entrepreneurs, and expats.

Gallery

Here are some pictures from this event.

The Takeaway

Because real conversation will always beat forced networking. Every time.

When you remove the pressure to pitch yourself and just let people be curious, something shifts. Stories come out. People listen. Connection happens naturally. That's what throwing a damn party can do.

If you're in Bucharest and want to experience this kind of gathering, keep an eye out for the next 3rd Space event.

Because whether I like it or not, I'm her first example.

First Example

Her first model of what a man sounds like when he's frustrated. How he treats people when no one's watching. What love feels like.

No future boyfriend. No husband. No teacher. They'll influence her. But I set the baseline.

Small Moments

When we're eating dinner. Reading a book. Walking to school. Missing tennis shots and laughing about it.

It doesn't look like a big moment. But it is.

Time with her isn't a bonus. It's the foundation. And the more present I am, the steadier both of our lives feel. This is something I've talked about on my podcast about custody and choosing to be present with my kids.

https://ericmelchor.com/wp-content/uploads/sites/73/2026/03/21bb89b361c24e57b81ea844487e0753.mp4

Aim Higher

One of my jobs as her father is to help her aim higher than the world will ask her to.

To set goals. To build competence. To expect more of herself. Not because she isn't enough, but because she's capable.

Clarity Over Control

She's growing up in a world that will show her everything, early. Sexualized media. Influencers selling confidence while quietly lacking it.

So my role isn't control. It's clarity.

Remind her that character matters more than appearance. That people who reduce others to looks usually struggle with their own worth. That strength is emotional, intellectual, and physical.

The Standard

And maybe the most confronting truth for me: Be the man I hope she marries.

If I imagine the kind of partner I'd want for her... Hardworking, steady, kind, courageous, committed. Then I need to embody that now.

Not to control her future. But to quietly shape what she believes is normal.

Learning to rebuild my life as a present father has been one of the most important journeys I've been on.

What It Means

Here's what it comes down to: Fathers set the baseline. The small moments matter most. Your job isn't control, it's clarity. And if you want her to recognize a good man, you have to be one first.

This isn't about being perfect. It's about being present and intentional. Every dinner, every book, every walk to school is shaping what she believes love looks like.

Happy Women's Day to the most important girl in my life.

The Concept

3rd Space is designed around one idea: Make it unusually easy for strangers to feel comfortable, fast. Here's what that actually looks like. We start simple. An innocent icebreaker like: "What's your favorite breakfast?" It sounds trivial. It's not. Low pressure leads to shared laughter, which leads to relaxed nervous systems.

Real Stories

From there, after some mingling we move into short, unpolished storytelling. No slides. No rehearsed TED-style talks. Just real people sharing real experiences. At our first event:

• Two guests shared stories from Cuba and Mexico.
• Another talked honestly about becoming an entrepreneur.

The room leaned in. People asked questions. It felt human and not rehearsed.

Structured Depth

Then we shifted into small, color-coded groups for deeper conversation. Not random mingling. Not awkward hovering. Structured depth.

Key Difference

And here's the key difference: Most social events optimize for volume. More people. More noise. More surface-level interactions. 3rd Space optimizes for quality of interaction per person. 20 to 25 people. Intentional structure. Designed friction removal.

The Result

Many people stayed long after the official end time. Conversations didn't feel rushed. Some stayed for karaoke. No one was trying to "get something."

3rd Space Bucharest is a cocktail-style gathering built for real connection. Not performance, not pressure. If you're curious about the philosophy behind these events, check out

• 

  Connections with Eric EP 8: Why Most Parties Suck (and How Not To Ruin Yours)

  Oct 29, 2025

  Welcome back to Connections with Eric! In this eighth episode, I break down exactly why…

.

Join Us

3rd Space Bucharest is designed for quality interactions over volume. Small groups, intentional structure, and a comfortable atmosphere where strangers become friends fast. Learn more about the

• 

  Bucharest Cocktail Parties

  Jun 20, 2025

  I got tired of going to the same old events and having the same superficial…

I host. The next monthly social is on March 16th. If you're in Bucharest and curious to learn more, I announce them on my newsletter.

Click here to subscribe

.

But I was nervous. Would people actually connect? Because that was the goal. Not "networking." Not trying to meet someone to date. Not a polished TED-style production. Connection.

The Principle

I designed the night around one principle: make it easy for strangers to feel comfortable.

We started with light icebreakers: "What's your favorite breakfast?" It's innocent. Low pressure. Surprisingly effective.

Then we tried something new: shared learning. Two guests told short, unpolished stories about traveling to Cuba and Mexico. No slides. Just real experiences. The room leaned in. People asked questions. It felt human. Another guest shared his advice for becoming an entrepreneur.

Lesson One

Later, we split into small groups by name tag color for deeper conversations. That's where I learned my first big lesson.

Most people stayed in those groups the rest of the night. Which meant fewer cross-room connections. Next time, I'll run two structured group rotations instead of one. Same depth. More mixing.

Lesson Two

Test everything.

The QR code for live feedback? It worked the day before the party but during the event it didn't work. I hadn't tested it. So no real-time feedback. That's on me.

Lesson Three

Make the events longer.

The event was supposed to end at 8pm. Many people stayed until 9. Some stayed for karaoke. One guy absolutely crushed three songs and got a full-room ovation.

What Worked

• Light icebreakers
• Short, human storytelling
• A clear structure
• A great venue with mics
• Interesting people from LinkedIn, Facebook expat groups, Instagram and past connections

What's Next

What I'll improve next month:

• Two group rotations
• Test everything the day of
• Start the event a bit later and make it 3 hours instead of 2

Biggest Takeaway

You don't need a master plan to build something meaningful. You just need the courage to take action. If you're curious about why most parties suck and how not to ruin yours, the answer often comes down to intentional design.

This was the first Third Space Bucharest cocktail party. And I'm excited about the next one on March 16th!

If you'd like to learn more or join, get on the waitlist here: https://lnkd.in/dCDw78Z4

So I focused on one thing: make it easy for people to feel comfortable and actually connect.

Light Icebreakers

We started with light icebreakers. Not the cringey kind, just enough context so you could quickly understand who was in the room.

The interesting part? Instead of spending the whole night talking to one or two people, most people ended up connecting with 7 to 10 people, naturally.

Shared Learning

Then we layered in something different: shared learning.

A few attendees, Alexandra Carmen Buza, Anca Constantin, and Alexandru Anghel, gave short 5-minute stories. Nothing polished. No slides. Just personal stories about traveling through Mexico and Cuba, and what it's really like to start your own company.

Memorable Moments

One detail that stuck with me: when I asked Alexandra what's one thing you must do in Mexico, she said visit a cenote, which is an underground cave lake.

I lived in Mexico and somehow never went to one. Still thinking about that.

The Format Works

And by the end of the night, one thing was clear: this format works.

People stayed. Conversations flowed. And a bunch of us hung out two extra hours talking, laughing, and eventually singing karaoke. That's usually a good signal.

Thank You

Huge thank you to Raluca Andreea Popa, PhD, Alexandra Roxana POPA-ISAC, Daniel Deaconu and everyone else who showed up open, curious, and willing to participate. You made the first 3rd Space Bucharest social in person connection something special.

What's Next

The key takeaway from this event is simple: when you create the right environment for connection, people naturally open up and build meaningful relationships. Light icebreakers, shared learning through personal stories, and a relaxed atmosphere can transform a typical cocktail party into something truly memorable.

If you're curious about how to throw better parties that actually bring people together, this format is worth trying. The proof was in the extra two hours of karaoke and laughter.

More in person events like this are coming. The March event is already 40% full. Get on the waitlist at https://lnkd.in/dCDw78Z4

If I live another 30 years and I see my closest friends about 2 days a year, that's 60 days total for the rest of my life. Sixty.

Meanwhile, I'm on track to spend thousands of days on my phone. Scrolling. Liking. Watching videos I won't remember tomorrow.

The Math

One of my closest friends lives in New York. I'm in Bucharest. Others are in Houston and California.

We're still "close." But proximity has quietly disappeared.

When I actually sat with that math, it hit me hard. Sixty days with the people who know me best. Versus nearly 5,000 days staring at a screen.

And for what? Half the time I'm just watching strangers fall off bikes on Instagram.

Paying Attention

So I started paying attention.

• How often I check my phone.
• How quickly I reach for it when I'm bored.
• How easily real connection gets replaced by digital noise.

The numbers were humbling.

Making Shifts

So I'm making a shift. Less time feeding algorithms. More time feeding relationships.

• More check-in calls.
• More voice notes.
• More "thinking of you" texts.
• More actual plans: dinners, game nights, small gatherings.

Because relationships don't run on autopilot. If you don't water them, they fade. And no amount of likes or emojis will replace time spent together.

Show Up

Nobody gets to the end and wishes they sent more connection requests.

They wish they showed up more. Called more. Made the time while it was still easy.

Your Reminder

If the math doesn't add up for you either: too much time online, not enough with people you care about. Maybe this is your reminder.

Sixty days isn't much. And if you don't protect it, it disappears faster than you think. If you're struggling with digital addiction, you're not alone.

The shift is simple: less time feeding algorithms, more time feeding relationships. Start with one check-in call, one voice note, one actual plan this week.

I host monthly small cocktail parties for people who want real connections in Bucharest. Check out this page for more info.

3rd Space Bucharest

.

How It Works

Here's what to expect:

• Small groups (20-25 people) in relaxed local venues
• Just enough structure to remove awkwardness (name tags, light icebreakers, short attendee-led stories)
• Conversations that go beyond "So... what do you do?"
• No networking. No dating angle. No pressure.

Real Interaction

It's not an event to collect contacts. It's a room designed for real human interaction. The first gathering is coming up soon, and without promotion, we're already ~60% full.

Your Room

If you've wanted deeper local connections but didn't know where to find them... Or if you keep telling yourself, "I should meet more people." This might be your room. We don't need bigger networks. We need better places to meet. If you're curious about

• 

  Bucharest Cocktail Parties

  Jun 20, 2025

  I got tired of going to the same old events and having the same superficial…

and want to connect with others in a meaningful way, this is your chance.

Join Us

The goal is simple: create spaces where real conversations happen and genuine connections form. No gimmicks, no pressure, just people meeting people. I've talked about

• 

  Connections with Eric EP 4: Depressed or Divorced? Just Throw a Damn Party

  Oct 2, 2025

  Welcome back to Connections with Eric! In this fourth episode, I share how a $15…

, and 3rd Space Bucharest is my way of putting that into practice for our community. If you're curious, check out the details about our February social and grab a spot here:

https://luma.com/nwhpafri

. Want to be the first to know about the next one? Let me know.

It's easy to set goals you can measure. Lose 10 pounds. Hit a revenue number. Finish a course. But fulfilling your potential? That requires movement without certainty. And that scares people.

The Waiting Game

Most of us get stuck right here:

"What am I actually supposed to do with my life?"

So we wait. We overthink. We do nothing.

A small group of people seem lucky. They're clear on their purpose early on. The rest of us aren't.

I'm not always clear on my life's purpose either.

But I am clear on this: I want to develop my potential.

Movement Over Clarity

So instead of waiting for clarity, I move. I follow ideas that itch. Especially the ones that help other people.

That approach has led me to:

• Launch a one-of-a-kind kids' fitness program
• Teach as an adjunct professor
• Interview innovative European tech founders
• Help B2B podcasters land their first paid sponsorships

None of these were part of a master plan. They were just the next step forward.

What I've Learned

Here's what I've learned: Fulfillment doesn't come from finding your purpose first. It comes from building skills, confidence, perspective over time.

So now I'm not asking: "How do I fulfill my potential?"

I'm asking: "What's the next way I can develop it?"

Because maybe, when the real opportunity shows up, I'll be ready for it.

Start Moving Today

You don't need to have your entire life mapped out to make progress. Building skills, gaining confidence, and developing perspective happens through action, not waiting for perfect clarity.

The most successful people aren't those who had it all figured out from day one. They're the ones who took the next step, even without knowing where the full path would lead.

Tired of traditional networking events? I host structured social gatherings in Bucharest where people come together to meet new friends, have engaging discussions, and build community connections. Stop waiting for your purpose to reveal itself and start developing your potential today.

If you caught episode 12 where I shared the crazy idea that gave me more purpose than my career, this episode is about the darker side of building connections: the apps engineered to keep you scrolling instead of actually living.

This episode is all about catching yourself scrolling without even enjoying it, why internet friends don’t show up at 2 a.m. when your car breaks down, and the moment I realized I was 15 years old again refreshing Bumble every 10 minutes.

Keep reading below for why I quit Twitter cold turkey, how LinkedIn became my new addiction, and what happened when I finally turned off all notifications and put my phone in another room at night.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Scrolling Without Enjoying It

You ever catch yourself scrolling through an app and realize you’re not even enjoying it? That was me with Twitter, then LinkedIn, and then, God help me, Bumble. What started as networking or dating turned into me basically being a lab rat pushing the dopamine button all day. And at some point, you gotta ask: is this actually helping my life, or just hijacking it?

Twitter: The First Addiction

You ever catch yourself scrolling through an app and realize you’re not even enjoying it? That was me with Twitter. I’d log on, banter with a few people I thought were interesting, throw out a tweet or two, and then keep checking back like some degenerate gambler at the slot machine. I did this for like three years.

And to be fair, Twitter gave me some cool stuff. I met some founders, I even booked my entire season three of my podcast Innovators Can Laugh from people I met there. So yeah, it wasn’t all bad. But here’s the thing, I realized I wasn’t enjoying the actual moments of my life.

I’d be at the park with my kids and they’d be like, “Daddy, look!” And instead of, you know, actually looking, I’m staring at my phone like a zombie. And you can’t exactly tell your 7-year-old, “Hang on buddy, this stranger on the internet just liked my tweet. That’s way more important than your Tarzan swing from that tree.”

So I quit Twitter. Cold turkey.

LinkedIn: The New Habit

But then, like some addict who quits drinking and suddenly “discovers” gambling, I just moved the habit over to LinkedIn. I was posting three-four times a week, learning how to write “hooks,” commenting on everyone’s stuff, checking notifications constantly. And yeah, I got results, 70% of my b2b podcast network came from LinkedIn. But again, these weren’t real friends. They were “internet friends.” Great for business, but they’re not showing up if my car breaks down at 2 a.m.

So I scaled way back.

Bumble: The Final Straw

Then came the separation and moving into my own apartment. And that’s when the little voice in my head said, “Hey, you know what you should do? Sign up for Bumble. That’ll solve everything.”

So I downloaded Bumble. And suddenly, I was 15 years old again, refreshing my phone every 10 minutes like: “Did she swipe? Did she like me? Oh wait, she unmatched. Guess I’ll just die alone then.”

That’s when I realized, these apps are engineered like casinos. Infinite profiles, infinite swiping, little dopamine hits every time someone matches with you. It’s not love, it’s not connection, it’s Pavlov ringing the dinner bell.

And you know what? It gave me anxiety. I’ve never really been an anxious guy, but suddenly I’m checking Bumble, Instagram, Facebook, and feeling restless, distracted, on edge. It wasn’t making me happier, it was making me worse.

What I Did

So here’s what I did:

• I cancelled my Bumble subscription.
• I stopped checking Facebook and Instagram daily.
• I started putting my phone in another room when I went to bed. (Because nothing says “loser” like waking up and immediately picking up your phone to check Bumble and see if you got any new likes)
• And I turned off notifications completely.

And now? I’m calmer. I wake up slower, I do some deep breathing, I’m actually present. I’m building real in-person connections instead of fake internet ones.

The Real Truth

Look, these apps aren’t all bad. I’ve made real connections through Twitter, LinkedIn, even Bumble. But the default setting is addiction. It’s engineered to keep you scrolling, not to help you live.

So if you’re stuck in that same loop I was, endless checking, endless scrolling, here’s my advice: shut it down. Go outside. Go talk to a real person. Because trust me, no one on Bumble is going to come help you move a couch.

Conclusion

Twitter, LinkedIn, Bumble, they all promised connection but delivered addiction instead. What started as networking or dating turned into endless scrolling, constant checking, and anxiety I never had before.

If you’re in Bucharest and want to connect in person, check out 3rd Space Bucharest.

The apps aren’t inherently evil. I met founders on Twitter, built my podcast network on LinkedIn, and had some decent dates from Bumble. But the default setting is designed to hijack your attention, not improve your life. You’re not using the app, the app is using you.

So I made changes: cancelled subscriptions, stopped daily checking, put my phone in another room at night, turned off all notifications. And suddenly I’m calmer, more present, and building real connections instead of internet ones.

The lesson? These apps are engineered like casinos to keep you pushing the dopamine button. If you catch yourself scrolling without even enjoying it, it’s time to shut it down and go talk to a real person. Because no one on Bumble is showing up at 2 a.m. when your car breaks down.

New episodes drop every Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 11 where I shared my Timeleft dinners with strangers, this episode zooms out to explore where this whole drive to build connections and create meaningful projects even comes from.

This episode is all about the difference between things that fade and things that stick, why I spent my lunch breaks running around elementary schools in shorts, and the new itch I’m feeling about tackling loneliness.

Keep reading below for why my expensive watch is just a reminder of bad financial decisions, how I cold-emailed fifty principals with zero background in education, and what happens when you chase the crazy ideas you’re not even “qualified” to do.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

The Stuff That Loses Its Shine

Here’s a weird pattern I’ve noticed: the stuff we think will make us happy, watches, cars, promotions, loses its shine in about a month. But the crazy, half-baked ideas we almost don’t pursue? Those are the ones that change us. I had one of those ideas years ago, and following it gave me more purpose than my actual career.

You know what I’ve realized? The stuff we think will make us happy, watches, cars, promotions, loses its shine in about a month. I spent two years saving up for this IWC watch, wore it for like four weeks, and now half the time I forget it’s even on my wrist. It’s just sitting there like a silent reminder of my bad financial decisions.

The Crazy Idea

But the crazy ideas, the ones you almost don’t chase because they seem too nuts, those are the ones that stick. For me, it happened back in 2007 when fitness trackers first came out. These little gadgets that counted steps? I thought: what if we gave them to kids and had classrooms compete against each other? Childhood obesity is a big problem in Houston underserved communities. This could actually help.

So I waited for someone else to do it. A school, a nonprofit, whatever. Year after year, nothing happened. Finally, I got so annoyed I said screw it, I’ll do it myself. Which is insane, because I had no background in education, fitness, or working with kids. I was a marketing director at a public company. My job was to stress out about budgets, not get third graders to run around a playground.

Still, I cold-emailed fifty principals. Three of them said they wanted the program in their schools.

Lunch Breaks in Shorts

Now picture this: my lunch breaks were spent running around elementary schools in shorts and a t-shirt, showing kids how to use fitness trackers. Then after work and on the weekends, I’d spend hours recruiting volunteers, writing grant requests, creating a website, analyzing the fitness tracker data and brainstorming ways to take the program to the next level.

But the program worked. The kids loved it. Teachers loved it. The data showed physical activity jumped 30% during the challenge. And you know what? It gave me a new identity. I wasn’t just “the marketing guy” anymore. I was the dude helping kids move more. I even helped organized Houston’s first kids’ fun run.

And here’s the thing: it was the proudest thing I’ve ever done. More fulfilling than any promotion or any watch. And it all started from a crazy idea I wasn’t even “qualified” to do.

The New Itch

Which brings me to today. Lately I’ve been feeling that same itch again, only this time it’s about loneliness. I’m not a therapist. I’m not some monk on a mountain. I’m a divorced dad living in a foreign country where I barely speak the language, trying to not be the sad guy eating hummus alone in his apartment. But I know loneliness is a massive problem, and I think I can do something about it.

That’s why I’ve been throwing cocktail parties, game nights, and trying out stuff like Timeleft dinners. I’m experimenting. Testing. Failing sometimes. But sharing what I learn along the way.

Chase the Crazy Ideas

So if you’ve ever had that intuitive nudge, like, “this could be something” but you’re scared you’re not qualified, go chase it. You’ll figure it out. And honestly? It might end up being the thing you’re most proud of in your entire life.

That itch to tackle loneliness is part of why I created 3rd Space Bucharest.

Conclusion

The expensive watch, the car, the promotion, they all lose their shine within weeks. But the crazy ideas you chase without being “qualified”? Those stick. Those give you purpose.

Back in 2007, I had zero background in education or fitness, but I cold-emailed fifty principals with an idea about fitness trackers for kids. Three said yes. And suddenly my lunch breaks were spent in elementary schools showing third graders how to move more. It became the thing I was most proud of, more than any career achievement.

Now I’m feeling that same itch about loneliness. I’m not a therapist or an expert, just a divorced dad in a foreign country experimenting with cocktail parties and Timeleft dinners, sharing what works and what doesn’t.

The lesson? Don’t wait until you’re “qualified” to chase the idea that won’t leave you alone. You’ll figure it out. And it might become the most meaningful thing you ever do.

But here’s the thing about chasing ideas and building connections: sometimes the tools we use to do it end up hijacking our lives. In episode 13, I share how I went from Twitter to LinkedIn to Bumble, each time thinking it would help, and each time realizing I was just a lab rat pushing the dopamine button. Episode 13 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 10 where I broke down how to use icebreakers as a cheat code for engagement, this episode explores a completely different approach to meeting people: showing up to a restaurant with zero control over who you’re eating with.

This episode is all about the difference between scrolling Instagram and actually showing up, why not every dinner was perfect but all of them were worth it, and the German guy who travels the world for free by cat sitting.

Keep reading below for what happened when I stopped saying I wanted new friends and actually did something about it, including the plastic surgeon who told me 20% of her clients are straight men getting butt implants.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Most People Say They Want Friends

Most people say they want to meet new friends, but then they go sit at home scrolling Instagram. I tried something different: I paid 25 bucks, showed up at a restaurant in Bucharest, and had dinner with five total strangers. Sounds awkward, right? Except it wasn’t. It turned into piano lessons for my kids, new friends at my cocktail parties, and even a wild conversation about men getting butt implants.

What Is Timeleft?

So here’s the deal. Most people say they want new friends, but then what do they do? They sit at home, scrolling Instagram, double-tapping memes like that counts as a social life. Me? I decided to try something different.

I signed up for this thing called Timeleft. You pay about 25 bucks a month, and every Wednesday night they slot you into a dinner with five total strangers. They pick the restaurant, you just show up. No swiping, no “hey, what’s up?” messages that go nowhere. It’s just, boom, here’s your table.

The First Dinner

And I’ll admit, the first time felt weird. Like, “what am I doing, speed dating for friends?” But it turned out awesome. Dinner started at seven, we didn’t leave till after 11. Great conversation, lots of laughs, and two of those people ended up in my actual life. One guy now comes to my cocktail parties. Another woman’s a pianist, and she’s teaching my kids how to play piano. Not bad for 25 bucks and some pasta.

Not Every Dinner Was Perfect

Now, not every dinner was perfect. The second one had this guy who just would not shut up. You know the type, no awareness, just monologuing like he’s on a TED Talk nobody asked for. I’m sitting there like, “Buddy, I didn’t come here to listen to your podcast.” But hey, I still clicked with another guy at that dinner, ended up inviting him to my cocktail parties too.

The Surprises

And there were surprises. Like the plastic surgeon at dinner number two. I ask her, “So, I guess most of your clients are women, right?” She says, “Actually, 20% are men.” And I’m thinking, “Okay, must be gay guys, right?” Nope. Straight dudes. And get this, most of them are getting butt lifts. Straight guys getting cheek implants. I didn’t even know that was a thing. Now I can’t go to the gym without side-eyeing the guy on the glute machine.

Another time, I met this German guy who travels the world for free by cat sitting. That’s it. He watches cats. I’m like, “What’s the job description? Feed it, scoop the litter box, try not to step on it? That’s your world tour ticket?” He’s lived in 30 countries like this. Meanwhile, I’m paying for Airbnbs like an idiot.

Every Dinner Was Worth It

Not every dinner leads to lifelong friends, but honestly? Every single one was worth it. The conversations were fun, it pulled me out of isolation, and yeah, sometimes I even recruited people to come to my cocktail parties which leads to other social outings. Win-win.

The Real Lesson

So look, if you’ve ever thought “I need more friends,” but your big plan is Netflix and DoorDash, do something different. Dinner with strangers sounds awkward, but it’s way less depressing than being the guy sitting at home talking to his cat.

Conclusion

Saying you want new friends while scrolling Instagram at home is not a strategy. Actually showing up to dinner with five strangers you’ve never met? That’s a strategy. And while it sounds awkward in theory, the reality is often surprisingly good.

Through Timeleft, I found a pianist teaching my kids piano, recruited people to my cocktail parties, and had conversations I never would have had otherwise. Not every dinner was perfect, some guy monologued like a TED Talk nobody asked for, but every single one was worth showing up for.

The lesson? Stop waiting for friends to magically appear. Take action, even if it feels weird. Pay the 25 bucks, show up to the restaurant, and see what happens. It beats talking to your cat.

But here’s what I’ve been thinking about lately: all these parties, all these dinners, all this effort to build connections. Where did that drive even come from? In episode 12, I share the crazy idea I had back in 2007 that gave me more purpose than my actual career and why the stuff we think will make us happy loses its shine in about a month. Episode 12 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 9 where I shared the Harvard study proving relationships matter more than money or career, this episode gets tactical about actually creating those connections at your events through well-designed icebreakers.

This episode is all about changing the entire dynamic of a party in five minutes, why asking about breakfast foods beats asking about biggest fears, and how a harmonica can shock a room full of strangers into paying attention.

Keep reading below for the exact icebreakers I use, when to run them, and why they’re actually a rescue mission for anyone trapped in a boring conversation about cat food.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Why I Love Icebreakers

Here’s why I love icebreakers: they change the entire dynamic of the party.

Instead of wandering around hoping you bump into someone interesting, you’ve now got a shortcut. Guests get a chance to broadcast who they are, “I’m a teacher,” “I volunteer at an animal shelter,” “I run a gym,” “I’m a designer.”

Suddenly the whole room opens up, and people have an easy excuse to approach one another. It’s like giving everyone a conversational hall pass.

The Timing

Now, I usually run two icebreakers at my cocktail parties. The first one happens about 30 minutes in, or once at least seven people have shown up. The second one comes an hour later, when the room is really buzzing.

So, for example, if the party starts at 7 PM, the first icebreaker is around 7:20, and the second one around 8:15.

Keep It Simple

The first icebreaker should be simple. Definitely not, “What’s your biggest fear?” or “Tell us about your worst date.” That’s not an icebreaker, that’s group therapy. Nobody’s ready to dump their trauma with strangers they just met.

Instead, I use fun, lightweight ones like:

• “What do you like to eat for breakfast?”
• “What was your first job?”
• “What’s your favorite drink?”

Nobody has to think too hard, and everybody can answer.

How I Run It

Here’s how I run it. I get everyone’s attention, sometimes I use a little harmonica, which, by the way, is a great way to shock people into silence. Seriously, try it. Everyone is wondering where that strange sound came from then I say something like:

“Alright everybody, let’s circle up real quick. We’re gonna do a quick icebreaker so we can get a sense of who’s in the room. Just say your name, what you do for work, or something you’re passionate about, and your favorite breakfast food. I’ll go first, then we’ll pass it to the right.”

After we go around the circle, I wrap it up:

“Great job, everyone. Now you all know at least one fun fact about each other. Go grab a drink, say hi to someone new, and we’ll do another one in a little while.”

The Second Icebreaker

The second icebreaker is a little more advanced.

At this point, people are more relaxed. I’ll ask things like:

“What’s your favorite book, show, or podcast right now?”

It’s easy, it’s fun, and it sparks conversations that last the rest of the night.

The Hidden Bonus

And here’s the hidden bonus of icebreakers: they break up conversations. If you’ve ever been trapped talking about cat food for 15 minutes because you’re too polite to walk away, an icebreaker is like a rescue mission. It resets the room, gives you an excuse to disengage, and lets you flow into new conversations.

That’s why I swear by them. Icebreakers aren’t cheesy. They’re a secret weapon. And if you’re hosting, you owe it to your guests to use them.

Conclusion

Icebreakers get a bad rap because most people do them wrong. Asking strangers about their biggest fears or worst dates isn’t an icebreaker, it’s trauma dumping. But ask about breakfast foods or favorite drinks? Suddenly everyone’s relaxed, laughing, and has an easy entry point to talk to anyone in the room.

The key is timing (30 minutes in for the first, an hour later for the second), keeping it simple and fun, and using them as a reset button for the entire room. They’re not just conversation starters, they’re escape hatches from boring conversations and shortcuts to making real connections.

The lesson? Stop avoiding icebreakers because you think they’re cheesy. When done right, they transform a room full of awkward strangers into people who actually want to talk to each other.

But cocktail parties and icebreakers are just one way to meet people. What happens when you pay 25 bucks and show up to dinner with five complete strangers? In episode 11, I share my experience with Timeleft and how dinners with random people led to piano lessons for my kids and conversations about men getting butt implants. Episode 11 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 8 where I broke down why most parties fail and the simple design fixes that make them work, this episode zooms out to answer the bigger question: why does any of this connection stuff even matter?

This episode is all about the longest study on happiness ever conducted, why relationships beat money and career every single time, and how I've been testing this research myself through annual guys' trips, cocktail parties, and being more intentional about staying close to the people who matter.

Keep reading below for why career wins don't hug you when you're down, the disastrous mountain biking trip that brought my friends closer, and what really keeps us healthy and happy for the long haul.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcast

What I Used to Think Mattered

When I was younger, I thought the game was about career wins and financial freedom. And don't get me wrong, those things matter. But now? They don't even crack my top three list of priorities. What matters most is being a great dad and staying close with the people who make me feel alive.

That shift didn't happen overnight. It came from reading a Harvard study on happiness, and then testing it myself through annual trips with my best friends, hosting cocktail parties, and being more intentional about the people I keep close.

The 85-Year Harvard Study

Back in 1938, Harvard launched what's now the longest study ever done on happiness. For 85 years they followed 724 people, asking them everything about their health, careers, families, and life choices. And here's the big finding: it's not money, it's not career achievement, it's not even exercise or diet. What keeps us healthier and happier the longest are relationships.

That one hit me hard. Because I've chased the other stuff, career wins, promotions, building things. And sure, those are good. But they don't hug you when you're down. They don't show up at your kid's birthday party. They don't pick up the phone when you need someone to vent to.

The Annual Guys' Trip

So after reading that study, I started making changes. One of the biggest was organizing an annual guys' trip. Nothing fancy, just a weekend adventure with my closest friends. And the adventures have been, let's call them memorable.

Like the time we thought mountain biking in Colorado was a good idea. Only problem? I trained in Houston, flat as a pancake. Two hours into the ride, my buddy Michael breaks his collarbone, I crack a rib, and suddenly the whole trip turns into an episode of Jackass: Middle-Aged Edition.

But here's the thing: even that disaster brought us closer. We still laugh about it. And every year, we find some new adventure, whitewater rafting in New York, dune buggies in Vegas, skiing in Iceland. These trips became the glue. Without them, honestly, we probably wouldn't see each other.

Why I Host Cocktail Parties

That same study is also why I host cocktail parties. They're not just about meeting new people. They're about building a social circle and then inviting close friends into that circle, deepening the ties. And I'll tell you, it works. When you see the same faces, when you laugh together, when you swap stories, it's like fertilizer for relationships.

I've even tried smaller things, like sending voice notes and quick check-in texts. A buddy of mine here in Bucharest is amazing at that, he calls, he sends handwritten cards, and it makes you feel like you matter.

The Real Priority

So look, career, money, achievements, they're fine. But if you ignore your relationships, you pay for it later. The science is clear. The people who flourish are the ones who put in the time with the people they love.

And for me, right now, that means being the best dad I can be, and then making damn sure I keep showing up for my friends. Because that's the stuff that lasts.

Conclusion

The longest study on happiness ever conducted revealed something simple but profound: relationships matter more than anything else. Not money, not career success, not even health habits. The quality of our close relationships is the strongest predictor of long-term happiness and health.

That research didn't just stay in a book for me. It became a blueprint. Annual trips with my best friends, even when they end in broken collarbones. Cocktail parties designed to deepen connections. Voice notes and check-ins to stay close with people who matter.

The lesson? All the career wins and financial freedom in the world won't hug you when you're down or show up at your kid's birthday party. Invest in your relationships like your happiness depends on it, because according to 85 years of research, it does.

But knowing relationships matter is one thing. Actually getting people to engage and connect at your events? That's where icebreakers come in. In episode 10, I share why most people think icebreakers are cheesy but they're actually a cheat code for engagement, and how to run them without turning your party into group therapy. Episode 10 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 7 where I hosted a cocktail party in Lisbon with LinkedIn strangers, this episode goes deeper into the mechanics of what actually makes parties work, beyond just getting people to show up.

This episode is all about the painful reality of poorly designed meetups, the awkward sailing conversation that changed everything, and why removing chairs might be the most important party decision you’ll ever make.

Keep reading below for the three game-changing strategies I use to design parties where people actually connect instead of just standing around pretending to be busy.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

The Sailing Conversation

Most meetups are the same: you walk in, there’s a long table of people already mid-conversation, and you instantly know, welp, I’m gonna spend the night talking to my one friend about sailing, even though I’ve never touched a boat in my life.

That’s why most parties suck: nobody thinks about how humans actually connect.

The Meetup That Made Me Realize Everything

So here’s what happened. The other night in Bucharest, I went to a meetup with a friend. The venue was fine, it was this outdoor garden. We walked in and there’s this giant long table with 20 people already seated. And nobody greets us. No host, no welcome, nothing. Just a bunch of people mid-sentence, sipping drinks, pretending they’re too busy to notice two strangers hovering like idiots at the edge of the table.

Now my friend, God bless him, decides he’s gonna walk around the entire table and introduce himself to every single person. Which is the most awkward thing in the world. Like, do you know how weird it is to interrupt people’s conversations just to shake their hand? Half the people didn’t even care. The other half were probably just annoyed. And I’m standing there thinking, “Great, this is how I’m spending my night, watching my buddy speed-date 20 bored strangers.”

And of course, we ended up at the end of the table, talking to one guy about, get this, sailing. I don’t even sail! I’ve never been on a sailboat in my life. But here I am, nodding along about ports in the Mediterranean like I’ve got a yacht parked out back. Meanwhile, inside my head, I’m wondering what the hell am I doing here?

The Problem with Most Parties

That’s when it hit me: most meetups and parties flop because they’re not designed for actual interaction. You can have the nicest venue, the best cocktails, a Spotify playlist curated by some hipster DJ, but if there’s no way for people to connect, the whole thing falls flat.

The Three Simple Fixes

So here are a few things I do differently when I throw cocktail parties:

Remove the Chairs

Chairs are a mood killer. Once people sit, they’re locked in. It’s awkward to walk up to someone who’s sitting when you’re standing. They look at you like you’re about to pitch them life insurance. So I hide the chairs, literally put picture frames on my couch to block it. Everybody stays standing, everybody moves, everybody mingles.

Send Pre-Party Emails

Not boring logistical stuff, though yes, I include the address and the no-shoes rule. But the real secret sauce is the bios. Two-sentence intros about each guest. Like: “Shelley used to be a professional video gamer.” Or “Joe is a network security consultant who likes interpreting his dreams.” Or “Amy’s a marketer who started a belly dancing group.”

Suddenly, guests aren’t walking into a room full of strangers. They’re walking into a room full of characters. And honestly, people get a kick out of reading their own bio. It makes them feel like they’re part of the show.

Use Name Tags

Yeah, I know, sounds dorky, right? But trust me, they’re game changers. If you’re in a room with 15 strangers, remembering names is impossible. A name tag makes everyone approachable. Nobody’s “above” anyone else. And when you can say, “Hey Joe,” instead of “Uh, what’s-your-face,” it instantly breaks the wall.

Here’s a quick story: at my 20-year high school reunion, I saw my old principal, Sister Donovan. I was thrilled. She looks at me and says, “Hi Eric!” And I was floored. I thought, Wow, she remembers my name after thousands of students, 20 years later. I walked away glowing, telling my friends about it. And they’re like, “You idiot, you’re wearing a name tag!”

So yeah, name tags might feel corny, but they work.

The Real Point

And that’s the point. Most meetups flop because nobody designs them for interaction. But with a few simple tweaks, no chairs, pre-party bios, name tags, you can turn a boring room full of strangers into a night people actually remember.

Don’t just throw people together and hope for the best. Design for connection. Make it easy for people to move, talk, and remember each other’s names. That’s the difference between a forgettable meetup and an unforgettable night.

Conclusion

The difference between parties that suck and parties that people talk about for months isn’t the venue, the drinks, or the playlist. It’s the design. It’s thinking about how humans actually connect and removing the barriers that keep them from doing it.

Remove the chairs so people mingle. Send pre-party bios so strangers become characters. Use name tags so everyone feels approachable. These three simple tweaks transform the entire dynamic of a gathering.

The lesson? Stop leaving connection to chance. Design your parties with intention, and watch how quickly strangers become friends.

But here’s the thing I realized after hosting all these parties and designing them for connection: why does any of this even matter? What’s the point of building all these relationships? In episode 9, I share the Harvard study that completely changed my priorities and why close relationships matter more than money, career wins, or anything else we chase. Episode 9 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 6 where I revealed the pre-game strategies that make parties work, this episode is about taking those skills on the road and proving you can build connections anywhere, even in a city you've never been to before.

This episode is all about the power of reaching out early, getting real recommendations from locals instead of Google, and why sometimes the best way to discover a new city isn't with a guidebook, it's with a wine opener and a portable speaker.

Keep reading below for how I went from zero connections in Lisbon to hosting a party with 10 strangers in an Airbnb within hours of landing.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

The Simple DM Strategy

Five weeks before my trip to Lisbon, I sent 20 simple DMs on LinkedIn:

"What's your favorite thing to do in Lisbon? 'm visiting for the first time this June and would love to get some ideas. Thanks."

Fast forward, I'm standing in an Airbnb in Lisbon with a dozen strangers, drinking Portuguese wine, and somehow hosting a cocktail party in a city I'd never been to before.

Getting Real Recommendations

That was it. Short, polite, no big ask. And the replies? Pure gold. One person suggested driving along the coast to Cascais with a stop for a beer at a beach restaurant called Atmaar. Another recommended a walking path between Garbeo and Cascais lined with cafés and scenic views. Someone else told me to hit up Sintra to explore the castles and soak in the history.

By the end, I had about 15 responses packed with heartfelt recommendations from people who actually live there. Not Google, not TripAdvisor, not ChatGPT. Real people. And that changed the entire vibe of my trip. Because instead of feeling like a tourist with a checklist, I felt like I had a warm welcome before I even landed.

The Crazy Idea

And here's where things got interesting. I thought, "Why not make this trip even more memorable and throw a cocktail party?" So I did something kind of crazy: I invited everyone who gave me a recommendation to a cocktail party in Lisbon.

I was staying at an Airbnb. I landed on a Thursday around 3:30 PM, went straight to the store, grabbed a few bottles of Portuguese wine, a couple bags of chips, and dusted off my portable speaker with my go-to playlist. The party was set for 6 to 8 PM the same night.

And here's the kicker: about 10 people showed up. People I'd never met in person, but because we'd messaged back and forth, it didn't feel like strangers walking into my Airbnb. We'd already swapped stories, shared tips, and now we were hanging out face-to-face with wine in hand.

The Party That Set the Tone

It was fantastic. They swapped stories about Lisbon, traveling, moving abroad. Some of them weren't even locals originally, they'd moved there from other countries. And instead of starting my trip scrolling through tourist brochures, I kicked it off with laughter, good wine, and warm, genuine connections.

Now, let me pause here, because I know what you might be thinking: "You threw a cocktail party in a random Airbnb with ten strangers off LinkedIn? What are you, insane?" And yeah, maybe a little. But you know what? It worked.

That night set the tone for the whole trip. Instead of awkwardly wandering the city with Google Maps out like a lost dad on vacation, I felt plugged in. Like I had a crew. And honestly, that's the thing nobody tells you: sometimes the best way to discover a new city isn't with a guidebook, it's with a wine opener.

The Lesson

It doesn't take much to throw a cocktail party. You don't need a five-star venue, a catering spread, or some grand plan. Sometimes all it takes is a simple DM, a few bottles of wine, and the guts to host.

And suddenly you're not just visiting a city, you're part of it.

The power of reaching out early, being genuine in your ask, and creating a reason for people to meet face-to-face can transform any travel experience from lonely tourism into real connection.

Conclusion

Building connections in a foreign city doesn't require elaborate plans or expensive networking events. It starts with simple outreach, genuine curiosity, and the willingness to create a space for people to gather.

The lesson? Don't wait for connections to happen. Create them. Whether it's your hometown or a foreign city, all it takes is reaching out, following through, and showing up with wine and an open door.

But here's the thing: even when you nail the pre-game and get people to show up, most parties still flop because nobody thinks about how humans actually connect. In episode 8, I break down why most meetups suck and the three simple design tweaks that turn strangers into friends. Episode 8 drops next Wednesday!

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

Social Dip

Among young people, socializing hasn’t just dipped, it’s collapsed. Party attendance is down by a staggering 70%.

This decline translates to:

• Fewer house parties.
• Fewer first kisses.
• Fewer friendships formed through shared laughter, awkward moments, and even those embarrassing moments.

Screen Time

Instead of connecting with others, we’re spending our evenings glued to screens, whether it’s phones, TVs, or laptops. We scroll through “social” media, but 90% of the time we’re not even looking at friends. We’re watching strangers.

Easy Doesn’t Mean Meaningful

It’s never been easier to stay home, order in, and keep to yourself. But convenience comes with a curse: The easiest activities in life often bring the least meaning. And the meaningful ones time with people, time outside, real connection are the ones we’re slowly abandoning.

Simple Solution

So maybe the answer isn’t another app. Maybe it’s something simpler:

• Go out.
• Invite people over.
• Host the dinner.
• Make a bad cocktail.
• Laugh too loudly.

Social Fitness

In the end, social fitness matters as much as physical fitness. And the only way to stay socially fit is to make spending time with others a priority.

Here’s me hosting game night with some friends in Bucharest

Conclusion

The decline in social interaction, especially among young people, is a worrying trend. We’re spending less time connecting with others in real life and more time staring at screens. The ease of staying in has overshadowed the value of genuine human connection.

The solution isn’t complicated. It’s about prioritizing real-life interactions and making an effort to spend time with others. Social fitness is just as important as physical fitness, and it requires conscious effort.

Ready to reclaim your social life? Start today! Invite a friend over, plan a night out, or simply strike up a conversation with someone new.

Follow me on LinkedIn, or X for more.

If you caught episode 5 where I revealed that nobody cares about your food or fancy cocktails, this episode dives into the one thing that actually does matter: the pre-game. The build-up. The work you do before anyone walks through your door.

This episode is all about lessons I learned from hosting 40+ podcast interviews, why most hosts fail before they even start, and how I use those same strategies to make my cocktail parties feel like you’re walking into a room full of characters instead of strangers.

Keep reading below for why the real party starts days before the first guest arrives and how a few simple emails can completely transform the energy of your event.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Most Podcast Hosts Do Nothing

I’ve been a guest on 40+ podcasts, and you know what 95% of hosts do before the interview? Absolutely nothing. They just show up, hit record, and awkwardly try to have a genuine and deep conversation with a stranger.

So when I started hosting my own podcast years ago, Innovators Can Laugh, I tried something different. I’d send my guests a quick video message before the interview, or play their favorite song when they logged into the recording studio. Suddenly, they felt relaxed, comfortable, even excited.

And that little pre-work? That’s the secret to making cocktail parties amazing too.

The Small Touches That Changed Everything

Back when I ran Innovators Can Laugh, I wanted my guests to know the show was different. That I wasn’t just another “tell us about your company” snoozefest. So I added a couple of small touches.

First, on the pre-recording form, I asked them their favorite song. Totally random, right? But on the day of the interview, I’d have that song playing when they arrived into the recording studio. And like magic, they’d start smiling. The nerves dropped. It put them in the right mood.

Also, a few days before recording, I’d send them a short personal video. Nothing fancy. I’d record it while walking back from dropping my kids off at school.

This is what I’d say:

“Hey John, excited to have you on the show this week. Can’t wait to talk about you and your business. Here’s a little clip of what the show’s like so you get a sense of the vibe.”

Easy.

But here’s the thing: these two simple touches completely flipped the dynamic. Guests showed up more relaxed, more open, and way more fun. And that’s when I realized, this idea works for cocktail parties too.

Because let’s be honest, nobody wants to walk into some random guy’s apartment in Bucharest without at least knowing if he’s a serial killer. A few pre-emails before the party? Boom, now you’re just the friendly weirdo with peanuts in a bowl.

The Pre-Party Emails

Before my parties, I send out a few emails, one a week before, another a few days before, and one the morning of the party.

In them, I include short bios of some of the guests. Just a sentence or two each.

Like:

• “Shelley used to be a professional video gamer and now channels that energy into strategy and problem solving.”
• “Amy’s a marketing pro who also started a belly dancing group here in Bucharest.”
• “Joe is a senior network security consultant who likes to interpret his dreams. Seriously.”

Little teasers like this make people excited. Suddenly they’re not walking into a room of total strangers. They’re walking into a room of characters. They’re curious. They want to meet Joe the dream guy or Amy the belly dancer.

And honestly, people even get a kick out of seeing their own bio included. It’s small, but it makes them feel like, “Oh, I’m part of the show here.”

Already In On the Joke

And that’s the key. You make people feel like they’re already in on the joke before the thing even starts. Otherwise, people are just standing there going, “So, uh, what do you do for a living?”

The pre-game creates anticipation. It builds curiosity. It turns strangers into interesting people before they’ve even met. And when they finally walk through your door, they’re not nervous or awkward. They’re excited.

The Real Lesson

So here’s the lesson: the real party doesn’t start when people walk through your door. It starts with the build-up. Whether it’s podcasts, cocktail parties, or even a wedding, the pre-game sets the stage.

Get people warmed up, curious, and engaged before they arrive, and the party is smooth sailing from there on.

Stop waiting until everyone shows up to create the magic. Start creating it days before with a few thoughtful touches that make people feel welcomed, excited, and already part of something special.

Conclusion

Great parties don’t just happen. They’re built in the days leading up to them through small, intentional touches that make guests feel seen, curious, and excited to show up.

Whether it’s playing someone’s favorite song on a podcast or sending teaser bios before a cocktail party, the pre-game is where the real magic starts. By the time people walk through your door, they’re not strangers anymore. They’re characters in a story they’re already invested in.

The lesson? Don’t wait for the party to create the energy. Start building it before anyone arrives, and watch how it transforms the entire experience.

But what happens when you take these party-hosting skills to a completely new city where you don’t know anyone? In episode 7, I share how I threw a cocktail party in Lisbon with complete strangers from LinkedIn and why sometimes the best way to discover a city isn’t with a guidebook, it’s with a wine opener.

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 4 where I shared how cocktail parties became my post-divorce therapy, this episode breaks down exactly what makes those parties work and why everyone is obsessing over the wrong things.

This episode is all about stripping away the Instagram-perfect party pressure and focusing on what actually matters: engagement, connection, and creating an environment where people want to stay.

Keep reading below for why my parties serve nothing but peanuts, why nobody remembers your wedding cake, and the real secret to hosting events people talk about for months.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Nobody Cares About Your Food

Here's the secret to throwing a great party: nobody cares about your food. Nobody cares about your cocktails. Nobody even cares about your apartment.

My parties have no food, just a bowl of peanuts. The wine's cheap. My living room is the size of a shoebox. And yet people leave saying:

"That was the best night I've had in months."

Why? Because it's not about the stuff. It's about the connection.

Everyone Obsesses Over the Wrong Things

When people throw parties, they obsess over all the wrong things. The menu. The cocktails. The venue. It's like planning a wedding. Everyone's stressed about the cake, the flowers, the table settings. But guess what? Nobody remembers the cake. What they remember is whether they laughed, danced, or felt connected to the people in the room.

Take my wedding. The best money I spent wasn't on the food or the cake. It was $400 on an MC. This guy worked at the same company as me, and a friend said, "You gotta hire him." So I did. And he was amazing. He got people dancing, playing games, even made them dance on folded newspapers until the guy had to hold his date in his arms just to keep from falling over. People still talk about that wedding, not because of the food, but because it was fun.

Meanwhile, the cake? Nobody gave a shit. We could've served Twinkies and people would've been fine.

My Tiny Living Room

Fast-forward to my cocktail parties now. My living room is tiny. Like, you couldn't fit a pool table in the living room unless you got rid of the couch. But I've had 12 to 14 people crammed in there, and it works. Because the magic isn't in the space. It's in the energy.

I don't spend big. No catering, no elaborate setups. Just wine, some napkins, clean the apartment, done. Half the guests don't even drink because in Bucharest, you can't drive if you've had a single sip. So what's left? Talking. Laughing. Engaging.

It's All About Engagement

And that's the key. Whether it's a cocktail party, a wedding, or a presentation, it's all about engagement. Are people connecting? Are they involved? Are they having fun?

Because at the end of the night, nobody remembers the wine label. Nobody remembers the food. They remember how they felt. And if you're the host, that's your real job: to create an environment where people actually want to stay, talk, and connect.

Stop Obsessing

So stop obsessing about whether the napkins match the couch, alright? Nobody gives a damn. Just get people in the room and make it fun. That's it.

The fancy stuff doesn't matter. What matters is creating a space where real conversations happen, where people feel welcome, and where connections are made. That's what people remember. That's what makes a party unforgettable.

Conclusion

The secret to hosting memorable parties isn't found in your budget or your venue. It's not about the food, the drinks, or the decor. It's about creating an environment where people feel connected and engaged.

My parties work because I stopped worrying about impressing people with fancy spreads and started focusing on bringing the right people together in the same room. A bowl of peanuts, cheap wine, and a tiny apartment are more than enough when the energy is right.

The lesson? Stop stressing about the stuff that doesn't matter. Get people together, create the right atmosphere, and let the connections happen naturally. That's the real secret.

But here's the thing: the real magic of great parties doesn't start when people walk through your door. It starts days before. In episode 6, I share the pre-game strategy I learned from hosting podcasts that turns awkward gatherings into nights people can't stop talking about. New episodes drop every Wednesday.

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn't know, I'm rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

Chance Meeting

A few years ago, I met Razvan Craciunescu at an event. Little did I know that this initial meeting would have such a profound impact on my journey.

The Recommendation

Months later, when the Dreamups team was looking for a speaker, Razvan remembered me and passed along my name. That single recommendation set off a whole chain of connections.

Expanding the Circle

Since I was traveling to Chisinau, I reached out to Maxim Rotaru, a former podcast guest. Although he wasn’t in town, he connected me with two of his friends instead: Elena Oprea and Viorica Vanica, co-founders of SelfTalk.space.

Cricova Winery

Despite being busy startup founders, Elena and Viorica made time to meet up. And where did we go? The legendary Cricova Winery. 🍷 We shared stories, laughed, tasted incredible wine, and formed a bond that made my entire trip unforgettable.

Lasting Impact

And it all traces back to a simple connection years earlier. Elena & Vio—so good to see you again. 🙂

Conclusion

This experience highlights the unpredictable yet beautiful nature of connections. A simple meeting can blossom into a series of opportunities and friendships that enrich your life in unexpected ways.

Connections aren’t just “networking.” They’re seeds. And you never know when—or how—they’ll grow into something meaningful. Cultivate your connections, nurture them, and watch them flourish.

Ready to grow your network? Start by reaching out to someone you met at a past event today!

Follow me on LinkedIn, or X for more.

Sure, you can join meetups, go to InterNations events, or use apps like Timeleft. But most of those are designed to give you more events and more people to meet. Not actual friendships.

So I am trying something different.

The Funnel

I use Internations and Timeleft as my “top of funnel.” A way to meet interesting people I’d like to know better.

Then, I host a cocktail party. Nothing fancy. Just a space to connect as humans first, not job titles.

From there, I filter again.

Game Night

I invite some guests back to my place for game night.

• Pizza on me
• Games ready
• Everyone brings their drink of choice

The result? Fun, laughter, and just the right amount of competition.

The Strategy

This is my little social playbook abroad. Not for stacking contacts. But for building friendships that actually last.

Conclusion

At the end of the day, I believe the quality of your connections determines the quality of your life. The social funnel approach turns casual meetups into meaningful friendships by intentionally moving from large gatherings to intimate settings where real connections can form.

Instead of collecting business cards or adding LinkedIn connections, this strategy focuses on creating spaces where people can show up as themselves. From first meetings at organized events, to relaxed cocktail parties, to fun game nights, each step brings you closer to finding your people abroad.

Ready to build deeper connections in your new home? Try applying the social funnel to your own life and see how quality beats quantity every time.

PS: You can read more about my social blueprint on my Substack. Click here to subscribe.

If you caught episode 3 where I talked about wasting free time on dating apps and deciding to build something meaningful instead, this episode is about what I built and why it worked better than I ever expected.

This episode is all about turning loneliness into connection, using cocktail parties as therapy (yes, really), and why sometimes the best way to heal is to invite a bunch of strangers into your tiny apartment with some peanuts and good music.

Keep reading below for how I went from depressed and isolated to hosting parties that changed my social life and why this might be exactly what you need too.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

Rock Bottom with a Twist

Imagine this: your marriage falls apart, you move into a tiny apartment, you’re broke, lonely, and depressed. What do you do? Most people would hide under the covers, binge Netflix, maybe start therapy.

Me? I read a book about throwing cocktail parties, and it changed my life.

The Long Goodbye

My marriage hit rock bottom in January 2023. For about two years I prayed, I begged, I did everything I could to save it. Some nights I didn’t sleep at all. I even started talking to myself, always a great sign you’re doing well, right?

Finally, after two years, I had to accept it: things weren’t going back to the way they were.

Because of money, I couldn’t move out right away. So for six more months, I stayed put. But mentally, I had been going through the stages: denial, depression, anger, and finally landed at acceptance. By the time I got my own place, I was ready to start fresh.

Four Years of Social Isolation

Here’s the thing: for four years in Bucharest, my social life basically sucked. I was working remotely, barely had in-person contact, and was mostly playing the part of “Mr. Mom.” Once I had my own apartment and free time, and after being distracted on Bumble for six weeks, I decided I was going to build a social circle from scratch.

One day, while listening to a podcast, I heard about a book called The 2-Hour Cocktail Party by Nick Gray. It’s basically a step-by-step playbook for hosting simple, low-effort gatherings that help you meet people and build connections. No expensive catering, no giant venue, just a framework that works.

So I thought, why not? I can do this. I can throw a cocktail party in my little apartment.

I mean, what’s the worst that can happen? Nobody shows up, and it’s just me standing there with a bowl of chips and a playlist on repeat? My marriage fell apart. My ego can handle it.

The First Party

So I hosted my first party in June. I invited 12 people, 9 showed up, and it was a hit.

One guest even told me:

“Eric, this isn’t the kind of party you expect. It’s not networking, it’s not small talk. It’s a group of carefully chosen people in one room: diverse, inspiring, and somehow all connected. Thank you. It was unforgettable.”

That’s when I realized, this wasn’t just about socializing. This was therapy for me but disguised as fun.

The Second Party

In July, I hosted another one. Invited 14 people, 10 showed up. The party lasted over four hours when it was only supposed to last two. We talked about skydiving, psychedelics, AI life coaches, addiction, sleep hacks, dancing, marketing, yoga, even moments in our lives when we felt fully alive.

This wasn’t the boring “So, what do you do?” kind of night. This was real connection.

And the best part? These parties pulled me out of isolation. They gave me energy. They were self-care.

I mean, who knew the cure for post-divorce depression was basically peanuts, cocktails, and strangers in your living room?

What I Learned

Here’s what I figured out: when you’re going through something hard, like separation or divorce, you can either withdraw or you can deliberately create opportunities for connection.

I chose connection. And not the swipe-right-on-Bumble kind. The real kind. The sit-in-my-living-room-and-actually-talk kind.

These parties weren’t just fun nights. They were proof that I could still build something meaningful. That I wasn’t just surviving, I was creating a life I actually wanted to live.

What’s Next

Now, I’m planning more. And not just more parties. I want to take it further. I want to turn some of these guests into actual friends.

The question is: how do you go from “fun night together” to “real friendship”?

That’s what I’m working on next.

PS: Want to read more on the Bucharest Cocktail Parties? Click here to read the full article!

Conclusion

When life falls apart, you have two choices: retreat into isolation or intentionally build something new. For me, that something new was a series of cocktail parties in my tiny apartment.

What started as a simple idea from a book became my unexpected therapy. It pulled me out of loneliness, gave me energy, and proved that even in your worst moments, you can create connection and community from scratch.

The lesson? Sometimes healing doesn’t look like what you expect. Sometimes it looks like a bowl of peanuts, a curated playlist, and a room full of strangers who become something more.

But here’s what I realized: everyone obsesses over the wrong things when hosting. The fancy food, the expensive drinks, the perfect venue. In episode 5, I break down the real secret to throwing parties people actually remember (hint: it has nothing to do with your budget or your apartment size). New episodes drop every Wednesday.

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

If you caught episode 2 where I shared how I stay present as a father living two blocks away from my kids, this episode explores what happens during those quiet hours when the kids aren’t around.

This episode is all about the trap of thinking freedom equals endless distractions, my brief but eye-opening journey into the world of dating apps, and why I decided to build something meaningful instead of just killing time.

Keep reading below for the lessons learned from my temporary return to teenage behavior and how I’m channeling that newfound freedom into something more purposeful.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcast

Other platforms coming soon!

Free Time Like a New Credit Card

Free time after separation is like getting a credit card for the first time. At first, you’re buzzing. You can buy anything! Swipe, swipe, swipe. But then the bill comes due.

For me, that bill looked like seven bad Bumble dates, a couple of half-drunk nights out, and the realization that I was just distracting myself.

The First Night Alone

When I first moved out after the separation, I didn’t know what to expect. I wasn’t exactly looking forward to all this new “free time.” The first night alone in my apartment? I cried.

I was used to the chaos. Kids running around, dishes to wash in the sink, bedtime stories, random errands my wife would throw at me like I was in charge of some invisible to-do list. Then suddenly… silence. No one needed me. No one was asking me to take out the trash. And that first week was rough.

But after a week or so, something shifted. I started feeling like a teenager again.

Vegas for Your Thumbs

I had free nights. Nobody is waiting at home. No bedtime routine. So I thought: “Alright… let’s see what this Bumble thing is all about.”

This led me to create a space for meaningful connections—learn more at 3rd Space Bucharest.

Now listen, I was in a marriage and in a relationship with my wife for 15 years. I had never used a dating app. I never got hooked on Instagram or TikTok. But this… this was different. It’s like Vegas for your thumbs. Swipe left, swipe right. “Oh, she likes tennis too? Boom. Match.”

Next thing you know you’re having conversations via text about your dream vacation or the last thing you cooked at 12 a.m. Crazy because I used to be in bed by 10:30, now I’m up at midnight trying to be charming to a woman who lives 40 minutes away and owns three cats. What the hell am I doing with my life?

Seven Dates and a Reality Check

So yeah, I went on like seven or eight casual dates in the first 6-7 weeks. Some were okay. Some were awful. And some were just… a waste of time.

And even though I only did this stuff on nights when the kids were with their mom, I still felt guilty. Like, “Should I be doing this? Shouldn’t I be using this time for something better?”

Because here’s what I started to realize: This dating app thing? It’s a black hole for your time and energy. You tell yourself it’s “just for fun,” but really it’s a distraction. And if you’re not careful, it becomes an addiction. No wonder people who are hooked on social media get depressed.

The Wake-Up Call

After about six weeks of this teenage-style phase, I had to stop and ask myself: Am I just going to keep watching old episodes of Seinfeld on Netflix and wasting time on Bumble? Is this my new normal?

And the answer was, hell no. I’m better than that.

So I canceled my Bumble subscription. I told myself: If I’m going to build a life I actually want, I need to do it on purpose. Not through random dates and late-night scrolling.

Building Something Real

I decided I was going to build a real social life, one that didn’t revolve around dating apps. So, I’m starting to host cocktail parties and game nights. I’m reaching out to people I actually want to get to know.

But more importantly, I started thinking about a new project, something that would give me a sense of purpose, a reason to get out of bed that didn’t involve checking if someone named “Maria who is into crystals and salsa music” had messaged me back.

The Truth About Freedom

Because here’s the truth: When you separate, you suddenly get this huge gift, time. But unless you give that time a project or a goal, it just gets wasted.

You end up doing stuff that feels like fun but leaves you empty:

• Binge-watching Netflix
• Going on random dates
• Scrolling endlessly on your phone

Freedom without focus doesn’t feel like freedom.

Finding Purpose in the Free Time

So that’s where I am now, trying to give this new free time a purpose. And if you’re in that same place, recently separated, recently single, or just suddenly holding more time than you know what to do with, don’t let it all get sucked into distractions.

Use it. Build something. Or you’ll wake up six weeks later wondering how your big accomplishment was learning how to filter for “within 5 miles” on Bumble.

Conclusion

The temptation to fill newfound freedom with mindless distractions is real and powerful. Dating apps, endless streaming, late-night scrolling, they all promise fun but deliver emptiness.

The real challenge isn’t having free time, it’s what you choose to do with it. You can either let it slip away on meaningless swipes and binges, or you can use it as the foundation to build something meaningful.

For me, that means real connections, purposeful projects, and using this unexpected gift of time to create the life I actually want, not just kill the hours until bedtime.

But here’s the real question: once you decide to build something meaningful with your free time, where do you actually start? In episode 4, I share how a $15 book about cocktail parties became my unexpected therapy and pulled me out of post-separation isolation—one bowl of peanuts at a time.

Want to see how I’m rebuilding my social life after separation through cocktail parties, game nights, and even Timeleft? Get my complete playbook by clicking here.

If you missed episode 1 where I shared my journey from six-figure success in Texas to becoming Mr. Mom in Romania, this episode picks up where that story left off.

Keep reading below for the key insights and strategies from this journey of redefining what it means to be a present parent.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcasts

The Fear

When I first moved out after separating from my wife, one thought haunted me: Would my kids feel like I was abandoning them?

I grew up in a divorced family, and I remember how much that distance hurt. The every-other-weekend visits, the gaps between seeing my dad, it never felt like enough. I carried that pain with me into adulthood, and I was determined my kids wouldn’t experience the same thing.

So I made myself a promise: even if my wife and I weren’t under the same roof, I’d find a way to be there every single day. That promise shaped every decision that came next.

The Daily Reality

Now, let me be honest—a lot of people say it must be hard not living with your kids 24/7. Yeah, but you know what else is hard? Actually living with your kids! Ever tried getting them dressed and out the door before school starts? Sometimes separation starts to sound like a spa weekend.

I share more about building community in Bucharest at 3rd Space Bucharest.

But seriously, after I moved into my new apartment, my biggest fear was that my kids would be upset, maybe depressed or sad, that I wasn’t there all the time anymore. So from day one, I made it my mission to minimize the impact of our separation on them.

Here’s what my average day looks like now: My apartment is literally two streets away from where my ex lives. I wake up, do a little work for 30 minutes, maybe hit the gym or do some yoga, then walk over to see my kids in the morning if they didn’t stay the night with me.

Sometimes I make them breakfast, but usually I just hang out with them and walk them to school, it’s only about a 10-minute walk away. After work, I pick them up. Some days we go back to my place where we’ll play Mario Kart or do exercises together (I’m teaching my daughter tennis and my son how to box). Other days we head to the park, play ping-pong, or go to soccer or tennis practice.

If they’re not staying with me that evening, I bring them back to their mom’s around 7 for dinner, and I usually hang out for another hour or two before heading back to my apartment.

Breaking the Cycle

Right now, they stay with me at least two nights a week. But the important part? I see them every single day, including weekends. And honestly, that’s the thing I’m most proud of as a dad in this situation.

When I grew up with divorced parents, I saw my dad every other weekend and maybe one day during the week. While I get that it’s “normal” for divorced parents, it didn’t feel normal to me as a kid. So I wanted something different for my kids.

I want them to be able to look back ten or twenty years from now and say:

“Yeah, my parents were separated, but Dad was always there. He showed up. He made us feel like we were the priority.”

Making Them Part of the Process

When I was looking for my apartment, I made sure the kids were part of the process.

“Hey, I’m going to find a new place. Come help me check it out.”

They came with me, helped pick out furniture, and got their room ready. We went to IKEA and they picked things out for themselves (which, by the way, is a good cheap meal where you can also get an ice cream cone for about a dollar).

When I finally got the keys, I didn’t just move in cold turkey. We eased into it. I spent a few hours there with the kids at first, then eventually a night or two. It was slow, careful, intentional. Throughout the whole process, we kept reminding them:

“This isn’t your fault. We love you. We’re still a family, we’re just doing things differently now.”

Learning from Experience

My son is eight, my daughter is five. I was about eight when my parents split. I barely remember the conversations, but I do remember the impact. And I’ve carried that with me into how I want my kids to experience this.

The thing that hurt me most about separating was the idea that I wouldn’t be under the same roof with them 24/7. That if they needed me, I wouldn’t be there. And honestly? That still hurts. But the next best thing, the thing that makes it bearable, is being close enough to show up every day.

My Advice

If I had to give advice to anyone going through something like this, it’s this: live close by. Make it easy to see your kids every single day. See them before work, pick them up after school, play with them in the evening. If your kids are the most important thing to you, prove it by showing up.

Yes, I live two blocks away. Yes, I see them every day. Yes, I’m at their mom’s apartment almost every morning or evening if they’re not with me. Because at the end of the day, I want them to know they’re the most important part of my life. Just because Mom and Dad live in separate apartments doesn’t mean that changes my love and time spent with them.

Conclusion

Separation doesn’t have to mean abandonment. It doesn’t have to follow the traditional every-other-weekend model if that doesn’t work for your family. Sometimes the most important thing you can do as a parent going through a difficult transition is to get creative about staying present.

For me, that meant choosing an apartment two blocks away and showing up every single day. It meant making my kids part of the process and prioritizing their emotional security above all else.

Because here’s the truth: being a present parent isn’t just about living under the same roof. It’s about showing up, day after day, and proving through your actions that they’re your priority.

But what happens during those quiet hours when the kids aren’t around? In episode 3, I share what I learned about handling sudden freedom after separation and why dating apps became my temporary obsession.

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation — cocktail parties, game nights, even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

In this episode, we talk about my complete life transformation from corporate success in Texas to becoming a stay-at-home dad in Romania. We dive into the reality of losing everything you thought was secure, making tough decisions during a crisis, and rebuilding from scratch in a foreign country.

Keep reading below to get a brief overview of the key moments and lessons from this wild journey.

Listen Now

Catch the full episode on your favorite podcast platform:

• Click here to listen on Spotify
• Click here to listen on Apple Podcast

Life Before

Five years ago, I was living in Houston, Texas with what most people would call the American dream.

I had a really good six-figure salary, plenty of money for vacations, investing, and a nice house in a good neighborhood. Two new cars. Playing tennis, running. My son James was in one of the best daycares in the city at $1,400 a month.

Our monthly expenses were probably $8,000, but it was fine, because I was making great money as a marketing director at a publicly traded company. Life was good. And honestly, I thought it would just keep going up from there.

Everything Changed

But then something called COVID happened. And right around the same time, my daughter Clara was born. That’s when everything turned upside down.

Now, if you don’t know this, when a woman has a baby in the States, after three months she’s expected to go back to work. Three months! You’re still shell-shocked and sleep-deprived and the government’s like, “Alright, let’s get back to the office.”

But Clara wouldn’t sleep in her crib, so me and my wife and her mom were taking turns holding her all night because she would only sleep in our arms. She wouldn’t eat well, she had health issues including surgery. Meanwhile, James was two, which is basically the human equivalent of a live grenade. Try juggling a newborn who won’t sleep and a two-year-old who’s screaming because you gave him the wrong color cup. That’s parenting during COVID.

And then I got laid off. Just like that. No job, no stability, and my wife’s mom returned to Romania. It felt like the whole thing collapsed overnight.

The Decision

So what do we do? My mother in law suggested moving to Bucharest, Romania, where she could help with the kids. So my wife and I sat down, made a pros and cons list. And actually, the pros weren’t bad:

• It’s safer – no worrying about school shootings
• The weather’s better – four seasons, not Houston humidity where you basically live inside a sauna
• Cost of living was cheaper
• My wife’s family was there, so we’d have support
• The lifestyle – you can be at the sea or in the mountains within three hours of Bucharest

So we said, let’s try it. Her company gave her the green light to transfer, though with a big pay cut. We sold our two cars, rented out our house. The only thing that slowed us down was waiting for Clara’s passport to arrive. But four months later, we packed our things, shipped about 15 boxes worth of stuff, and moved.

Mr. Mom

When did it really hit me that I was building a whole new life abroad? Probably about six months in. Because if you’ve ever seen the movie Mr. Mom, that was me. I was Michael Keaton. Making breakfasts, daycare drop-offs and pickups, running with the stroller, taking Clara to the park every day. Meanwhile, my wife was working U.S. hours, from about 5 p.m. until midnight. So I was basically doing the whole dad show: breakfast, daycare for James, dinner, bedtime, repeat. I didn’t really mind it though because I enjoy spending time with my kids.

And when I finally found work here, the pay was really small compared to Houston. I used to make more in bonuses than I was making in an entire year here. But I knew that going in. It wasn’t about getting rich in Romania. It was about family, balance, and trying to survive.

Life Now

Fast forward a couple years, and things weren’t going as planned. My wife and I, well, let’s just say we’re separated now. For about two years, I really tried to hold things together: suggesting we seek marriage counseling, praying, all of it. But it didn’t work out.

So here I am, five years later after COVID started. Living in my own shoebox apartment. Doing my best to make sure the separation doesn’t negatively impact the kids. Trying to build a new social circle. And let me tell you, when I moved here, I didn’t have a single close friend. No job, no connections, nothing.

But I’m finding my way in a pretty unique way. Instead of the usual expat meet-ups or awkward networking events, I started throwing cocktail parties and game nights. Inviting people I think I would click with. And it’s been amazing, not just for me, but for everyone who comes.

Conclusion

Sometimes life completely changes your path when you least expect it.

From a six-figure salary in Texas to becoming a stay-at-home dad in Romania, this journey shows that starting over isn’t always about adventure – sometimes it’s just about survival and finding what really matters.

In episode 2, I dive deeper into one of the biggest challenges of my separation: staying present as a father when you’re no longer under the same roof as your kids. Click here to read about it.

For more episodes and stories like this, check out my complete episode guide. And fyi, if you didn’t know, I’m rebuilding my social life after separation — cocktail parties, game nights, even Timeleft. Want the playbook? Get it by clicking here.

They think it’s all about the house, the car, and the investments.

But here’s something uncomfortable to think about: none of that stuff matters if you don’t have people to share it with.

Real Wealth

Real wealth doesn’t look like what most people think. It’s not about your bank account or your possessions.

Real wealth looks like:

• Friends you can text when you need help
• People who check in on you just because they care
• Getting invitations to things that actually make you feel alive

The Midlife Wake-Up

Here’s what happens to 99% of people: they don’t realize this truth until midlife hits. That’s when loneliness starts creeping in and they wonder what went wrong. They spent years chasing the wrong things while neglecting the connections that actually matter.

Being Intentional

That’s exactly why being intentional about nurturing relationships is so important. It’s why hosting cocktail parties makes sense. It’s why creating connection where there is none becomes a priority.

The other night was a perfect example. Delia, Oana, Anca, Karina, Ruxandra, Anna, Loan, Danial, Tim, and Milan brought incredible energy and made it unforgettable.

Conclusion

The quality of your connections really does equal the quality of your life. While everyone else is chasing material possessions, the smart move is investing in relationships. These connections become your real safety net, your source of joy, and what makes life worth living.

Don’t wait until midlife to figure this out. Start being intentional about your relationships now. Create opportunities for connection and watch how it transforms not just your social life, but your entire experience of living.

If you’re in Bucharest and want to experience this kind of connection yourself, get on the waitlist by clicking here.

What happens when the life you planned falls apart and you’re thousands of miles from home?

This question became my reality, and it’s exactly why I created “Connections with Eric”.

In this article, is my podcast about rebuilding your identity, creating community from scratch, and learning to live fully after love and in a place you never expected to call home.

Listen Now

We are live on Spotify and Apple Podcast! Click below to listen.

Spotify

Apple Podcasts

Who It’s For

This show is for anyone who’s trying to find connection and rebuild their life.

From stories about starting over to relearning how to make friends as an adult, I share what I’m learning along the way.

The Message

Even when everything changes, you still get to write the next chapter. That’s what I believe and what this podcast is about.

Episode Guide

I’m launching the first 3 episodes all at once, then rolling out new episodes weekly. Click on any episode below to read more about what I cover in each one.

Episode — Title

1 — Six Figures in Texas… Now I’m Mr. Mom in Romania

2 — Every Other Weekend with my kids? Screw That.

3 — Separated after 15 years and Suddenly 19 again.

4 — Depressed or Divorced? Just Throw a Damn Party

5 — Tiny Apartment, Huge Vibes: What Actually Matters at a Party

6 — Nobody Cares About Your Cheese Plate – how I get people excited about a party before they walk in

7 — The Secret Weapon That Makes Parties Instantly Better

8 — How to Make Friends in a Foreign City Without Looking Like a Tourist Loser

9 — Why Most Parties Suck (and How Not to Ruin Yours)

10 — Harvard study – Close relationships, matter more than money or fame

11 — Dinner With Strangers? What’s this Timeleft thing?

12 — You’re Not Qualified? Perfect, Do It Anyway

13 — Two Friends and a Divorce — That’s My Starting Lineup

14 — From Twitter to Bumble: My Detox from Digital Addiction

15 — The Google Sheet Hack That Fills My Cocktail Parties

16 — If Grandma Could Smile Through Chemo, You Can Survive a Breakup

17 — 4,851 Days Online vs. 60 Days With Friends — Here’s the Shift I’m Making in my Relationships

18 — The Post-Party Playbook: Emails, Systems, and Real Connections

19 — Ten Businesses, Zero Dollars, One Cocktail Party That Worked

20 — Forget the Champagne—Here’s What Actually Makes Parties Work

Conclusion

This podcast is for anyone who’s felt lost, disconnected, or unsure about their next steps. It’s about finding your way forward when life doesn’t go as planned.

Ready to write your next chapter? Listen to Connections with Eric and join me as I learn to rebuild, reconnect, and start over.

This was not your typical “So, what do you do?” kind of night. There were no pitches and no panels. It was just people—curious, open, and completely unfiltered.

Memorable night

Ditch the Small Talk

When you create a space where the usual professional masks can come off, you get conversations that are as varied and fascinating as the people in the room.

We moved past the surface-level questions and dove straight into what makes us tick, what we fear, and what makes us feel alive.

The energy that comes from that level of authenticity is something you just can’t find at a standard networking event.

Human Connection

This is exactly why I host these nights. In a world saturated with transactional interactions and elevator pitches, there’s a deep-seated need for genuine human connection. These gatherings are my answer to that—a place where the goal isn’t to exchange business cards, but to share stories, ideas, and vulnerabilities.

It’s about prioritizing real conversation over forced networking. Building relationships on a foundation of shared humanity is infinitely more powerful and rewarding than collecting contacts.

Conclusion

Here is what I learned from this party:

• Authenticity Over Titles: The most memorable connections happen when conversations go beyond professional roles and scripted pitches.
• Create the Right Environment: An atmosphere that encourages open, unfiltered dialogue allows people to show up as their authentic selves, sparking deeper discussions.
• Connection, Not Collection: Prioritizing genuine human interaction over the goal of collecting contacts leads to more meaningful and lasting relationships.

A huge thanks to Diana Mereu, Milan Gherga, Mihaela Marinitu, Andrei Stoica, Anca Tanasescu, Raluca Bacinschi-Stratulat, Alexandra Carmen Buză, Alex Visa, Philippe Laine, and Adrian Stratulat for making this cocktail party one for the books.

If you’re in Bucharest and want to experience the next one— send me a DM.

Follow me on LinkedIn or Patron View for more.

Group picture

What stood out?

How easy it felt.
How generous everyone was.
How conversations flowed without effort or status.

This is why I host these gatherings. To create spaces where people show up as humans first—not job titles.

I hope for more cocktail parties to come.

Same vibe.
Same mission: end isolation, spark friendship, and make in-person magic happen.

If you’re in Bucharest and want to experience the next one— send me a DM.

Thanks to Cristina M., Cristina E., Daniel D., Daniela R., Angelos F., Mihnea H., Cristina P., and Lama H., for making this night memorable.

Follow me on LinkedIn or Patron View for more.

Instead of forced conversations and exchanging business cards, what if you could just have cocktails with interesting people?

That’s the simple, powerful idea behind The Bucharest Cocktail Parties. This isn’t about dating or professional networking. It’s simply a 2-hour cocktail party I carefully curate to bring together a small group of amazing individuals for an evening of genuine connection.

Here’s more about it.

The Process

The beauty of the experience is in its simplicity.

I plan everything, you just show up! I designed the process to be effortless for my guests.

1. Take my quick personality test. This helps me understand who you are.
2. I select 14–17 interesting people for an engaging evening and meaningful conversations.
3. I organize the location, the drinks, and the atmosphere.
4. Show up and enjoy the evening.

The Experience

My goal is to create an environment where connections happen naturally.

It’s a refreshing change of pace from typical events, fostering genuine conversation in a super casual and thoughtfully arranged setting.

It’s an evening I design to be remembered.

What People Say

I’m incredibly grateful for the feedback I receive, and I’m happy to share what some of my past guests have had to say about their experience.

“Thanks a lot for having me, it was an evening to remember! Super casual, got to meet innovators in the tech space, and managed to build connections at a personal level.”— Diana Nicolae

“Eric, thanks for organizing! What I appreciated were the 2 ice breakers, which gave me an overview of who was in the room and who I’d be interested in talking to, as well as the all-round mix of different people. And of course, the wine made sure everybody was openly sharing.”— Alexandru Anghel

“Eric, thank you for the memories you created last night. Somehow you managed to create a group of people with so many common interests and yet unique personalities. I left the room with a strong feeling that these kinds of gatherings add a small brick to every participant’s self-development also creating the foundation of a community of smart working people driven by authenticity and sustainability.”— Cristina Martinescu

The Organizer

My name is Eric Melchor, and I’m a Texas expat living in Romania.

I dive deeper into the philosophy behind these gatherings on my podcast, Connections with Eric.

I conceptualized Bucharest Cocktail Parties in 2022 because I wanted to create an environment where I could meet other interesting people, but that wasn’t like your typical networking event.

The Point

Beyond just a pleasant evening, I build my parties on a core belief about how the best things in life happen. It’s about creating the conditions for serendipity.

I believe life happens to people who are open — to new opportunities, new people, new experiences.

The Guests

I curate my guest lists to include open-minded and driven individuals from various backgrounds: tech, entrepreneurship, art, design, film, food, architecture, writing, science, journalism, wellness, you name it.

Each party is a unique mix of smart, interesting people ready to have a real conversation.

Past attendees have included people like:

• Monica Zara (How to Web)
• Marina Rosu (LegalZen)
• Gregoire Vigroux (La French Tech)
• Raluca Haulica (Alura)
• Mihnea Craciun (Endeavor)
• Andrei Stoica (Stoica)
• Adrian Gheorghe (Microsoft)
• Alin Rosca (Repsmate)
• Ciprian Cazacu (EasySales)
• Ionut Vlad (Tokinomo)
• Valentin Radu (Omniconvert)
• Cristina Alina Neamțu (Amc)
• Miriam Constantin (V7 Studio)
• Vicentiu Vlad (Stock.Estate)
• Elena Vrabie (The Recursive)
• Ioana Dragomir (Tulipr)
• Alexandru Anghel (Solo)
• & more.

Conclusion

It’s time to make new memories and connect with innovators here in Bucharest.

The process is simple: get on the waitlist, get invited, and celebrate with new people.

I host events about once a month at a private location in the city center or at my apartment. I plan everything, you just show up.

Ready to join? Click here to join the wait list.

Follow me on LinkedIn or Patron View for more.

There is no agenda. Just a bunch of folks I’d crossed paths with on LinkedIn who also believe the internet should lead to real connection.

This wasn’t part of how I planned my Lisbon trip – it was pure spontaneity.

The Party

So I threw a last-minute cocktail party. Vinho Verde. Unfiltered conversation.

Stories about Lisbon, life, and side projects. It was the perfect warm-up before Santo António took over the streets.

Our cocktail party

Conclusion

We need more of this: Less scrolling. More gathering. Turning online nods into real friendships.

The best trips? They’re not about the sights. They’re about the people.

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The pressure to create the “perfect” gathering often overshadows what truly makes an event memorable and meaningful for guests.

Lessons from Seven Cocktail Parties

I’ve hosted 7 cocktail parties in the past 2 years.

Here’s what I’ve learned: Most things people obsess over don’t matter.

What Doesn’t Matter

The dress code, the perfect venue, and the artisanal cocktails.

These elements consume so much planning energy and often have minimal impact on your guests’ experience.

What Actually Matters

Who’s in the room, how easy it is to connect, and shared curiosity, not business cards.

Power of Authentic Connection

The best events don’t feel like networking.

They feel like a warm, human alternative to impersonal, generic networking events.

This is what people prefer.

Conclusion

When planning your next gathering, resist the urge to perfect every detail.

Instead, focus on curating the right mix of people and creating an environment where genuine connections can flourish naturally.

Your guests will remember the conversations they had, not the brand of gin you served.

Just… people. Real people with real lives in the city I’m about to visit.

Here’s the full story.

My LinkedIn Strategy

Here’s exactly what I did:

1. I opened LinkedIn and filtered my 1st-degree connections by location: Lisbon, Portugal.

2. Then I messaged about 20 of them with one simple ask:

Quick one [Name]—what’s your favorite thing to do in Lisbon? I’m visiting for the first time this June and would love to get some ideas. Thx!

I kept the approach intentionally casual and personal. No formal requests, no lengthy explanations—just a friendly ask between connections.

The Responses

The replies? Pure gold.

Allan suggested a coastal drive to Cascais, with a stop for a beer at a beach restaurant called Adamastor.

Thalita told me about a walking path between Carcavelos and Cascais lined with forts, cafés, and stunning sea views.

Todd shared a mix of hidden gems—from Estrela Park to Miradouro Lisboa.

Teresa insisted I visit Sintra, explore the castles, and soak in the history.

I received 15 responses packed with genuine, heartfelt recommendations. From people who actually live there. From friends. From connections who care.

This Beats AI

Sure, AI could’ve delivered a polished itinerary in 10 seconds. But it wouldn’t have felt like this—like community, like conversation, like a warm welcome before I even land.

The difference wasn’t just in the quality of recommendations, though those were exceptional. It was in the human element that no algorithm can replicate.

To everyone who replied—thank you. You made this trip feel human before it even began.

Lisbon, see you in two weeks.

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I’ve seen niche B2B shows—like Content Marketing Commute—pull fewer than 100 downloads a month and still generate leads for enterprise SaaS companies.

What Really Matters: The Host’s Obsession

So what should you look for?

Not a number. A person.

Specifically: a host who’s genuinely obsessed with their topic.

Think about it:

• Joe Rogan jumps from boxing with Teddy Atlas to black holes with Neil deGrasse Tyson. Listeners follow because he’s interested.
• Andrei Zinkevich dives deep into ABM—and attracts an audience who loves that.
• Stephanie Melodia talks to startup founders because she’s genuinely curious—and her show keeps growing.

The Trust Factor

When the host cares, the audience leans in. And when the audience leans in, your ad lands.

I discuss authentic connection on my own podcast, Connections with Eric.

That’s why podcasters in my network only promote brands they actually like. Not just whoever’s cutting the biggest check.

The Real Metric That Matters

Because in podcasting, trust is the real metric.

The next time you’re evaluating podcast advertising opportunities, skip the download spreadsheets. Instead, listen to a few episodes.

Does the host sound genuinely passionate about their subject matter? Do they engage authentically with their guests and audience?

That enthusiasm and authenticity will translate directly into better results for your brand—regardless of whether the show has 100 or 100,000 downloads.

I help brands reach their target audience via B2B podcasts host-read ads. Feel free to check out our case studies at b2bpodpros.com.

It’s a simple tradition I started—every year on their birthday, I send my kids a time capsule message. He’ll read it when he’s 25, and it might just be the most important email he ever receives.

Here’s how it works.

Digital Time Capsules

Each birthday email captures three essential elements that represent who my child is at this exact moment in time.

The little joys of this age: what he played with, what made him laugh, the show he watched on repeat.

The milestones: swimming on his own, memorizing 20 capital cities, scoring his first goal. (He’s particularly proud of that last one.)

A few photos and clips from the year: nothing curated. Just us, being us. Raw, authentic moments that social media will never see but that tell the real story of our family.

A draft of my email

The Wisdom

I also include two pieces of fatherly wisdom.

I explore themes of connection and what matters most on my podcast, Connections with Eric.

This year’s gems:

• “You don’t have to attend every argument you’re invited to.”
• “Try to be consistently not stupid, rather than trying to be very intelligent.” (Thank you, Charlie Munger.)

These aren’t just clever sayings—they’re life lessons wrapped in memorable phrases that will hit differently as he grows.

Why do I do this? Because I want my kids to know that while the world pulls their attention in a thousand directions—they were always the center of mine.

And maybe someday, when they need it most, that email shows up in their inbox like a message from the past, reminding them of who they were and how much they were loved.

Conclusion

Every parent wishes they could freeze time, capture the magic of childhood, and somehow tell their future adult children just how precious these years really are.

You don’t need fancy tools or perfect words. Just open your email, start typing, and schedule it for 17 years from now. Your future child—and your future self—will thank you for it.

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